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all right fellas what’s it gonna cost for a dedicated phone line of daud reading me the phone book and x-rated novels. no funny business. how much are we talking.

13 notes
29/09/14 @ 11:02pm
Your teeth look like beautifully peeled mini potatoes <3

all right now you guys are just trying to out-weird each other LMFAO

so some big stuff happened today

i was born with hypodontia, or tooth agenesis. when you’re little and your baby teeth fall out, your big-kid ones grow in to replace them. and, well, my side incisors didn’t really get the message. on one side of my two front teeth, the permanent tooth never formed - and on the other side, I got a weird little fang instead.

having a missing incisor is more common than ever in my generation, which is actually kind of cool, because scientists think we’re evolving. because humans have cooked our food for so long now, they think we’re losing the special teeth our ancestors used for raw meat.

but as cool as it is to think you’re evolved, let’s face it: it doesn’t look great. ever since I was in middle school I’d been wearing a prosthetic, to cover up that I had a gaping hole in the front of my mouth. on top of that, I had to take asthma steroids when I was young, and they stained the teeth I did have yellow. you can imagine I, like, never wanted to smile in pictures again.

but this year was different. I had endosteal implant surgery last december, and this summer we were finally able to afford whitening and crowns. this month we paid them off and today I got the crowns put on, meaning no more little fang - and no more gaping hole. after 12 years, my teeth are finally done being fixed.

and I figured the least I should do was make a cheesy blog post about it.

i think i should just own that i’ve reached don bluth boyfriend tier with drawing men

welcome to the land of slicked back hair and suspenders and rolled up sleeves

23 notes
27/09/14 @ 10:46pm
tagged as
have you considered designing rosie in sims 4? or getting someone else to do it? bc in sims 4 you can actually make girls buff like rosie and whenever i see her i get reminded (and i'd make u a buff rosie but i dont have time these days)

i’ve never been a sims player, but if anybody has it, they 100% have my blessing to make rosie

i know volition endorsed a set of SR homie sims, oleg included. i can see it now. rosie sets the house on fire. oleg marries death. matt miller is the painting gremlin in the basement

it&#8217;s still summer somewhere

it’s still summer somewhere

18 notes
@ 09:56pm
tagged as
ok I know I didn't dream it but I have to ask because I really want to see it again. Did you reblog a vine where a girl with awesome white hair said something like "remember the time I said I like you?" then at the end of it she did a some sort of laugh and you tagged it as something like she's so much like Rosie please I really want to see it again huhuhu
18 notes
26/09/14 @ 10:25pm
tagged as
hello yes police i would like to report tumblr user nihilnovisubole i h ave evidnece of heinous thievery committed *pulls out tape recorder and plays into phone* "hi i'm AK nihilnovisubs ole and i ST OLE FROM MY MOM'S PURSE AND HOARD 10,000 PO T TATOES "


Hey AK, can you give me some tips on aging characters? Like how to draw a 15 year old vs a 25 year old vs a 40 year old?

hmm all right this won’t be very comprehensive but I can try! also it’s more about changes within adulthood than big age jumps

I remember a lot of art books talking about head proportions, and the size of the head itself in relation to the body. [YMMV on that, though, because my mother and I hit our adult height when we were in middle school.] A baby’s forehead will take up a huge amount of its face, but by the time it grows up, everything else has caught up to it. I mean, I still have a huge forehead, but anyway.

Obviously everyone is going to age different, but here are some things I’ve observed can happen to people as they get older: The nose gets larger. The ears get longer. The mouth gets wider and thinner. You lose cheek fat, so the cheekbones look more prominent, and you may look more “hollow” under them. And any number of things can happen to your eyes, from heavier eyelids to bags to crow’s feet. In general, the whole body starts to give way to gravity.

There’s nothing wrong with that, of course, it’s just what is. Some people even benefit from it. Carmen Dell’Orefice was cute at 20, but now she’s a goddess.

So I’ve got a character here who’s middle-aged. Let’s see if I can make her look younger, keeping the same getup:


Apart from taking the gray out of her hair, I’ve made her mouth fuller, her eyelids lighter, pulled up her eyebrows and cheek, and tightened the skin on her throat and ear. If I were going in reverse and aging her up, I’d switch it. I’d think down and in, instead of up and out.

And then there are the people that “soft age,” which are annoying when you don’t wanna do a lot of complex coloring. They don’t so much wrinkle as their skin just gets loose, and it’s easier to do that with shading than hard lineart. Oleg’s character model is downright pruney, but I give him a smoother face, so it’s hard to get his real age across sometimes.


Here I’ve given him his trademark large nose, under-eye bags, frown lines, visible cheekbones, and a bit of a jowl. They’re there, I swear.

Finally, I might think about the environment my character’s in. A teen with a hard life may have a more mature, serious face. A cyborg might look way younger. Sailors back in the day used to get leathery skin from the sun, and deep eye wrinkles from squinting in the wind.

Hope this helps!

3,835 notes
25/09/14 @ 03:11pm
tagged as
oh no red-on-gold and white-on-gold
rip ak


Sakai Hōitsu (1761-1828), Maples and Cherry Trees, after 1817.

21 notes
20/09/14 @ 09:33pm
tagged as
ask meme for ts
saints row for ts
kirrosie for ts
rosie and her barber?

"I can’t believe how you let me down like this." Vasily feigned suffering as he shaved the back of Rosie’s neck. "A man with no hair."

"Last night at dinner you asked him why he didn’t marry me."

"I’d had too much to drink, my dear," he groaned. "Come on! Priorities.”

Rosie paused… then smirked.

"Shut up. You like him."

"I do." Vasily chuckled to himself and turned off the razor. "I do."

oleg/rosie + dild

As Rosie turned the page of her magazine she heard a deep, ragged sigh from behind the bathroom door.



The door opened and Oleg’s hand stuck out, holding a silicone horror the size of a soda bottle.

Should I ask?

Rosie rolled her eyes and yelled back, “I don’t know, Oleg, should you?!”

The door swung closed. “I thought not.”

Rosie/Oleg, Puttin' on the ritz

"Roza!" Oleg stumbled out the door after her, his tuxedo shoe untied. "Stop!"

Rosie whirled around. “What the fuck, Oleg, we’re late!”

Oleg cracked a bashful smile and reached for her collar. “Your tie’s crooked.”